In the aftermath of a school shooting, children often experience long-lasting fear and anxiety, even if they were not directly involved. The pervasive media coverage, social media discussions, and conversations at school can make it difficult for children to move past the event. As parents, it’s essential to help your child cope with these emotions in healthy, constructive ways.
Understanding the Root of the Fear
Fear following a traumatic event like a school shooting is natural. It stems from the loss of a child’s sense of safety and the realization that the world can sometimes be unpredictable and dangerous. While fear serves a protective function, when it becomes overwhelming, it can impede a child’s daily functioning.
For some children, fear may manifest in avoidance behaviors—they may express reluctance to go to school, avoid talking about the event, or withdraw from social interactions. Others may exhibit hypervigilance, constantly worrying about their safety or the safety of loved ones.
Strategies for Managing Anxiety
- Establish Routine and Normalcy
Routine provides a sense of security and predictability, which can be incredibly comforting for children after a traumatic event. Keep regular routines for meals, bedtime, and other daily activities. While it’s important to allow time for your child to process their feelings, maintaining a sense of normalcy will help them feel more grounded.
- Limit Exposure to Media
Constant exposure to news and social media content about school shootings can reinforce a child’s fear. Children may not understand that these events are rare, and frequent media coverage can make it seem like these incidents are happening all the time. Set limits on media exposure, and be mindful of what your child is consuming online or on TV.
- Encourage Healthy Outlets for Expression
Children need healthy ways to express their emotions. Encourage activities like drawing, journaling, or playing music, which can help them process their feelings. Younger children may benefit from role-playing scenarios with toys or dolls, while older children and teens might find comfort in discussing their feelings with friends or engaging in physical activities like sports or yoga to release tension.
- Teach Relaxation Techniques
Teaching your child how to manage their anxiety with relaxation techniques can be incredibly helpful. Simple breathing exercises, mindfulness meditation, or progressive muscle relaxation are effective tools for calming the mind and body. Practice these techniques with your child so they can use them when they feel overwhelmed.
Creating a Safety Plan
One way to help alleviate fear is by empowering your child with a sense of control. Work with your child to create a personal safety plan. This could involve discussing school safety procedures, identifying trusted adults they can turn to if they feel unsafe, or even practicing lockdown drills at home in a calm, non-threatening manner.
Encourage Peer Support
Peers can be a significant source of comfort for children. Encourage your child to talk with their friends about their feelings. Some schools may also offer peer support groups where children can share their experiences in a structured and safe environment. Knowing that they are not alone in their feelings can help reduce anxiety.
Model Healthy Coping Behaviors
Children often take cues from their parents on how to react to stressful situations. It’s important to model calm, healthy responses to anxiety and fear. While it’s okay to express your emotions, try to demonstrate coping mechanisms such as deep breathing, problem-solving, or seeking support from others. Your child will likely follow your lead.
In the final blog post of this series, we will discuss the importance of community support and how to advocate for changes in school safety policies to help prevent future tragedies.